Yes you were hurt and shattered and broken into pieces in the past and the pain that gave you was unbearable.
Then why have you adopted that pain and become a parent to it? Why can’t you just abandon it by learning the lessons and let it be in the past, not present and future anymore?
Here’s the reason why: Because feeling unfulfilled and blaming a disrespectful relationship, or unpleasant childhood do not require work or responsibility. It simply requires blame. Understandably your pain was bitter and you are simply nursing it by doing nothing to eliminate it.
People fall so in love with their pain, they can’t leave it behind. The same as the stories they tell. We trap ourselves.”
— Chuck Palahniuk
Fall in love with taking responsibility of easing out on your life, so that it allows for all the good to flow in which is unfortunately being blocked currently by the past that is the past, not the present and the future. Do not allow past painful memories and as a bonus point, past painful people into your life; because as the great poet Maya Angelou noted, “When people show you who they are, believe them.”
Show yourself baby, who you are.